Category Archives: Philosophy

Elevator Enlightenments

It is almost 12:30pm and I am finishing up an email in a hurry. I need to hop out to meet hubby for a quick lunch. This is Thursday afternoon, sun is out again and having a lunch date in the middle of a work day is never a bad idea. Our favourite joint has reopened after 2 months, with a new look & name and guess what, they are giving a 50% discount on all bills for the first week! Oh of course, we care more for the food there. And, I find myself not really typing much anymore; my thoughts have drifted to the delicious bowl of katsu curry…

My stomach growls so I finish the email, grab my jacket in style and sprint to the doors. I’m the only one in the elevator, so I think to myself this will be a quick ride down thankfully. I turn to the mirror behind me, adjust my glasses and glare at my hair. I quickly comb my hand through the sides and sigh looking at it. It is never in its place. The number of times I must have pursed my lips and cursed my hair is tending to infinity by now.

I hear the polite elevator lady come alive suddenly; it has stopped on a few floors below and two impeccably dressed ladies walk in . I know this is the Human Resources floor, they usually walk in and out in groups, incessantly chatting. We exchange customary smiles and I begin to stare at the floor. Not really, I am actually checking out their shoes, I have a fetish. Well, who doesn’t!

And I digress.

An elevator is a small area, so even if you are too polite you cannot help but overhear the conversations. Perhaps that’s why people fall back on complete silence, sometimes stop breathing even I feel. But not my two companions today! They are discussing how their arms aren’t getting any thinner, how their skin looks dull, and how envious one is of the other’s well-shaped glossy nails, among other such comparative compliments. It is the ground floor finally, I zip up my jacket and head out. The sunshine isn’t warm, the wind is strong and chilly. My hair begins to fly all over the place and I keep trying to pull it back together. Sighing all through. 

My thoughts slowly drift back to the conversation in the elevator. It is almost ingrained in us to find faults with our appearance, isn’t it? No matter which part of the world, women will never be at peace with their bodies. No wonder the skinny models and photoshopped posters have become benchmarks for perfection, and sadly so. I have disliked my hair from the time I have stored memories in my brain! And what if, I think to myself, hating my hair for all these years is actually what made it worse! What if I had sent some good, positive energy, some love towards it and maybe my hair would have listened and only got better with time?

It is just a theory. But it sure sounds like it will be worth a try. Doesn’t it boil down to loving and accepting ourselves for who we are, exactly the way we are? Loving our outward appearance is as important, probably more so in today’s times, so that we are not driven to madness by the judgmental world. So what her hair is curly, or my waist isn’t 28 inches anymore, so what your eyebrows aren’t done or her thighs are prominent. These quirks are what make each of us unique, and we should be accepting of us, as a whole.

I am approaching the other end of this long walk to hubby’s office, I spot him looking in my direction. Our eyes meet, and soon hands are in hands. He immediately compliments, “your hair looks nice, is shining in the sun”. I gape at him for a few seconds and then smile a thank you back! Of course, my hair looks good, I think to myself. Yes, it does.

And the slow long process of testing my theory with practicals just began.

Follow Your Heart, Not The Herd

Oft these days, I come across blogs, articles and interviews about people who quit their ‘9-5’ job to follow their true calling. I read about how life in a cubicle was almost stifling and offered no contentment that they had hoped for, and how taking that leap of faith turned out be their best decision. It is inspiring to read such stories! Choosing to do what you love over something you are unenthusiastic for is definitely the best gift you can give to yourself. Especially, if you found yourself bound by the strings of society and you decided to break those shackles.

One of the more popular true-callings that I read about happens to be travelling the world. Some others are about starting-up on their own, building apps, games and services what not. Trust me when I say, I think all this is absolutely great! I’ve had the opportunity to interact with a few such gems, thanks to social media. And their enthusiasm is infectious; their belief in what they so passionately do commands respect.

However, I have also come to observe how this is benchmarking what makes you successful, more importantly, happy. Unless you have jerked off some (or at least one) of those societal shackles, you are probably not doing it right in life! That, if you are leading what is infamously known as the ‘corporate life’, you are seen as moving farther away or even completely foregoing the simple pleasures of life. That, you are monetising your life by striving to go up the corporate ladder! I feel confused when I hear people tell me about their jobs with such disdain, because well, they are just ‘9-5’ jobs. “What would you rather be doing then?” is (as politely as possible) my next question, and pat comes the reply, “Oh, no. I love my job, but well – it is just a corporate job. Nothing fancy you see!”.

Jumping to extreme viewpoints is a plague our world is diseased with. The ‘either-or’ philosophy is what we go by, anything grey is befuddling. Also is the habit of labelling everything. This is good, that is pathetic. That is cool, this is boring. What I am trying to say here is, just because one is trending does not mean the other is completely meaningless. A career with the corporates teaches you as much as travelling the world on your own – yes, they teach you some very different things and that’s the difference you want to choose for yourself.

As I sit staring out the window in our living room, feeling rather preachy, I remember the whatsapp texts from my brother the other day, telling me excitedly about this taxi driver who studied economics and yet chose to taxi simply because he loved meeting new people; and then I also remember my two friends who went travelling around the world for months and have now come back rejuvenated to reinvade the corporate world, this time in the sphere of their interest.

To them I raise a toast, for, no job is less fancy if you find the joy in your heart to do it day in, day out!

 

PHOTO: #ThrowbackThursday To Conventional Holidays!

Summer of ’09 was special for two reasons: I got the best hairstyle that I have ever had in my life, and my family, on the whim of my younger brother, decided to take a vacation!

Kuala Lumpur is a popular holiday destination; throw in Singapore for a few days in between, it is unbeatable! And that’s exactly how we planned it. We got ourselves a packaged tour. Itinerary prepared, accommodation and food taken care of.  And we stuck to the schedule! Stopped at all the tourist spots, took in all the history, read all the information-tablets, soaked in the sun where possible, tasted some yumm food and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves!

As it sounds, our time in Kuala Lumpur was quite contrary to the popular norm of ‘exploring the unexplored’ & the self-organised unconventional vacation(s) of these days. And it was perfect that way! Sometimes, when you want to spend quality leisure time with loved ones, you don’t want to be invested in the grander picture of how well you experienced your destination. The simply joys lie in how much laughter did you pack together, how many more happy memories did you create, and just how much fun you had in each other’s company, doing the very conventional of things!

Our 10-day trip to Kuala Lumpur & Singapore was exactly about all that. And, today’s #throwbackthursday post is to some of the choicest moments of our wonderful time there!

All Smiles

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Have you been on conventional tour packages? Were they fun?

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PHOTO: #ThrowbackThursday To ‘The Land Of Clouds’

Conversing with a tweet-friend earlier today, I was reminded of my childhood days. I spent a good ten years of that in the then Bihar, one of the eastern states in India, growing up in the wild among hills! It is an iron-ore mining township, located above and among the hills of the Bonai range. Life there was fun, to put it simply. And very simple too! There were two schools – if you didn’t get into one, you went to the other; one shopping centre – anything you wanted you got there; friends and classmates meant the same thing; all the roads were our playground and the big colony lived like one big family – everyone knew everyone else, sometimes even if they didn’t want to!

And today, sitting in my warm apartment on a cold winter night in London, I cannot help but feel terribly nostalgic about those ‘Wonder Years’! Sal trees, heavy rains, warm sunshine, elephants, waterfalls, picnics – things that are synonymous with my childhood. And no better day than this to dedicate my #ThrowbackThursday post to this wonderful small town called Meghahatuburu (meaning: the land of clouds), where I spent the most blissful of times!

I took this photo during my visit with my family in 2007. This is close to the guest house we stayed in, right next to the colony – of course quite away from the main road. I couldn’t resist the call of the valleys and hills!

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What I Miss Most About Home

My husband and I spent all of December 2014 in India. On vacation! Travelling home is always special, for three reasons that I can think of: time with family & loved ones, delectable home food and the sunshine! Of course, the sound of the night watchman’s stick banging on the road every night in the same rhythm comes a close fourth!

I don’t know where the time flew! We spent a cumulative of 37 days among 7 cities, and meeting with a lot of family and friends. Planning such visits while trying to include as many as possible into our list is always a challenge. And this December visit was no less, but what’s fun if it’s not hard to do!

Now back in London, I often catch myself reminiscing the month that went by, so fast!

As I pack my lunch for work, I think of all the food doled out of grandma’s kitchen. You will not believe how many unique dishes I got to eat in the 15 days I stayed at grandma’s – 58! Doing the math, that’s 2 new dishes for every meal of the day! Grandpa had prepared a comprehensive menu, handwritten I must add, with all the days listed and everyone’s favourites, preferences and travel schedules incorporated into that one A4 sized sheet! It was adorable. Being the new block on the kid (oh! I don’t think I mentioned it before, I was the new kid around them as they are my husband’s grandparents and I was visiting them only the 3rd time since I got married!), I would sit with them in the evening, sipping on tea or tomato soup even and discuss to ‘fine-tune’ the menu in order to confirm next day’s plan for the kitchen. It was one of the most hilarious conversations, and exceedingly cute too!

There were, at one point, 18-19 people in the house, visiting! Including us, of course. And that inevitably meant post-dinner card-games! Given how cold it gets inside the homes at night during (Indian) winters, all of us would gather around the big divan in the lounge room, a big razai in the middle into which we tuck in our legs and sit covered in shawls. And, we played round after round of some gazillion types of card games! I didn’t even know there existed as many! Have you heard of games like 29, Bonus, Sh!thead, 3-2-5? And of course, there were ‘accusations’ of someone cheating, or tiffs on how the cards weren’t dealt correctly whenever someone lost – and that would lead to another ‘fair trial’ and suddenly it is past midnight and the house-play is only getting started!

Late nights, early mornings, heavy lunches and long dinners! Of course, I wouldn’t know where the time went. And it was not always about food. Soaking in the warm sun in the garden, a siesta by the window post lunch, an evening stroll in the by lanes just before tea – all such moments spent with love and in complete bliss!

If you are with me until here, then I haven’t bored you out. That said, the above is gist of just half my time in India. I keep the other half for another time, both the stories and the take-away from them.

Meanwhile, standing in my kitchen in London as I pack my lunch to work, these are the scenes that flash by, filling me up with not only gratitude, but also a resolve to keep my ties stronger to withstand any distance (any time zone)! There is also one other thing I realized, about what I missed the most about being at home – the Indian kitchens! The gas stoves, the utensils, the spice masala boxes and all the mess that comes with having so much happening all at once in one place!

Which is why, I am sharing some of the photographs of the lovely grandma’s lovely kitchen:

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