New Filled With Nostalgia

2025 brought lots of newness into our life. One of which was moving into our new home, in a new area of London, and adopting a fully suburban life.

The landscape of this area is characteristically hilly, and there are leafy residential roads all around. Our house is located near the top of one of the hills, and the drive home overlooks a valley full of oaks & beeches, dotted with many good-looking houses that have generous rear gardens and deep driveways. We often go down a slope and climb up another just to meet local friends! The views from upper-floor windows of most houses must be spectacular no matter the direction. Naturally, it’s been a big change from what we were used to seeing around us for over two decades – tall apartment buildings, taller offices, hustle-bustle of people, noise of cars & sirens, and just the busyness of a city life. And to suddenly have birds chirp at me in the mornings, squirrels come in to say hello or have a neighbourhood fox visit our garden – it’s a huge visual adjustment that we hadn’t fully anticipated, honestly!

That said, the biggest change of the past year has been to get our son to start nursery. And this adjustment was an emotional rollercoaster. The timing of it couldn’t have been any more challenging and overwhelming. We got him to start roughly two weeks after we moved in to the new place. It is heartbreaking no matter the age they start nursery at, and no amount of preparation can stop the tears on day 1 (or 2 or 3…).

Well, it was tough I won’t lie. I will borrow the famous words of Michael Rosen (author of the book We Are Going on a Bear Hunt): “We can’t go over it. We can’t go under it. Oh no! We’ve got to go through it!” to say, we have somewhat got through the tough part, I think. Maybe.

A part of the whole nursery drop-off / pick-up experience was (still is) doing the up-down on the slopes around here. His nursery is located down the hill from us; most times it’s a car ride doing the work but sometimes it is a walk too. It’s a steep gradient for a kid to walk, and so far he’s shown no qualms about it – he enjoys the slow walk every few days, notices the new flowers and changing colours of leaves on the way, picks up small stones for his ongoing collection and mostly talks about which route he’d prefer to take on his way back (because let’s be honest, coming back home is the most exciting part about going to nursery after all).

And so, besides the visual and emotional adjustments, there was this aspect of a physical adjustment with this new place. The walk to-fro train station is roughly 18mins now, along a slope-y road; the nursery-runs offer a good cardio on a 15-degree incline every few days; and of course the visits to the parks & huge playgrounds add to the joy of movement with an active 3yo in tow.

All of this brings me to a conversation with Amma, one evening, when I was discussing (ok, sighing!) about how this new life is so new in so many ways. And she was rather surprised when I explained all of the above towards what I meant by “new”. She smiled, and said, to the contrary, all this reminded her entirely of how and where I spent the first few years of my life!

And just like that, scenes from my childhood played slowly in front of my eyes like a film on a reel.

We lived in this little township in the interiors of an eastern state in India. The place sat in the lap of the dense & hilly Saranda Forest that covers the regional belt, rich in iron ore and other minerals. Our surroundings were made up of tall Sal trees, and others like Mahua and Jamun. I used to cross a hillock to go school every day, because taking the ‘pukka’ road meant a longer but boring walk. Going up and down the township slopes was how we kids played, in fact it was how we went anywhere at all – be it to the shops or friends’ homes. Elephants were a common sighting given the jungles were near by, but foxes at night were a common, albeit scary, sight too!

With a sudden rush of emotions, I realised all this newness around me had been washed over with paints of utter nostalgia! I was also marvelling at my own forgetfulness of how I never put this together myself. I should have seen the similarities. I lived in those hills once as a carefree kid, and now perhaps as a mum I was too close, too occupied, and too lost in my world, scrambling from one day to another, to really see any of it.

It definitely felt like a full circle moment – to be building a life in a little corner of London that resembles a life I led over three decades ago in another part of the world!

So, this is what I want to leave you with – my twopence worth: sometimes we need to zoom out a little to be able to make sense of the patterns (we are making) that are impossible to see when we’re standing too close. And the process might bring what truly matters back into focus: that life is often less about finding new answers and more about rediscovering the ones we’ve been carrying with us all along.

Perils of having a good memory

Quoting my favourite, Nora Ephron, from one of her essays as a journalist :

“I will tell you something else: they didn’t drink wine back in the early fifties and sixties. Nobody knew about wine. I mean, someone did, obviously, but most people drank hard liquor all the way through dinner. Recently, I saw a movie in which people were eating take-out pizza in 1948 and it drove me nuts. There was no take-out pizza in 1948. There was barely any pizza, and barely any takeout. These are some of the things I know, and they’re entirely useless, and take up way too much space in my brain.”

Such ease in her self-realisation.

If you identify with what Nora Ephron says about knowing and remembering (what’s usually perceived as) the useless, then you’d also agree how no one really knows why certain people are able to remember the mundane like they do! I, for one, fit the bill perfectly and have never figured the ‘how’ either (having given up on the ‘why’, a long time ago!)

At work, I know by-heart random 6-digit identifiers, exact folder locations, long names of documents and database tables, exact figures on a report, to the second decimal sometimes. I am the walking-talking reference book for my colleagues to look up such information from! As much as I try to look sheepish about it, I secretly pride myself at the marvellous memory I’ve been blessed with. Like, the other day, I related a search analysis to another we did almost 8 months ago; I recollected the details and later confirmed I was right, at which point of course, my colleague gave me a side glance with a raised brow that probably dubbed as, “Why, Ramya, why, why on earth would you remember that?!”

Continue reading “Perils of having a good memory”

Four Things I’m Still Old School About

Ask Google!” is possibly the most common piece of advice we get these days. It speaks volumes of how far technology has come to make our lives depend on a few click of a buttons. Sure, some things are easy to do now; some we didn’t imagine until a few decades back are now possible. The smartphones, iPads and tablets are like our personal secretaries, reminding us of birthdays, anniversaries, helping book appointments, saving articles, making reading on-the-go doable, play music whenever we want. And all that is great! Really, no sarcasm.

And no, this is not an essay here in support of  these advancements or even to question whether they are making us dumber and less social in the real world. For, I haven’t got an answer to such a complicated question! I wish I knew better though.

The reason I started to write this piece is because of a quiet thought that made its home in my mind the other evening. As I was walking back home from work, I started to make a mental list of things I still do the old-fashioned way. I mean, without using any form of smart-technology, whatsoever. Not many came through, but these are definitely the ones I am very particular about!

1. Post-Its & Notepads For Messages/Reminders/Lists

The habit of leaving notes behind goes back to my parents. They used to write cute ones for me, when leaving for a business tour in the wee hours or stepping out to the near-by pharmacy during my afternoon nap and so on! And it has now evolved to keeping them posted on the kitchen shelf, back of the main door sometimes, even on the pillow on special occasions! Some hang on the PC at work too, reminding me of deadlines or things-to-do. Grocery list is always made on a notepad that stays on the coffee-table. I cannot do without a small dose of writing dow my lists for the day!

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2. A Travel Journal Is An Absolute Necessity

No matter how many pictures you click, you need words to seal the memories in forever. won’t you agree? I always carry a small diary with me, it allows me to jot down thoughts, poems, emotions and memories that cross my mind. Notes in my iPhone never evoke the same, for me. Colloquial usages, names of local ingredients in food, fancy street names, of that fruit seller who gave you his bit of the history of the place – it helps to remember all of that, so much more clearly in the quiet of my home and makes for a better blog post too, you know!

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3. Books Should Be Made Of Paper, Only

I have never been a fan of downloading and storing bytes of e-books! While in college, I absolutely avoided studying from PDFs on my laptop. It’s no wonder how much time I spent in the library there. And might I say, it shouldn’t be very surprising to find out the first piece of furniture we bought together for our home is a beautiful tall bookcase! Kindle maybe be as good as holding a hundred books in your hands, but it can never attach the excitement the smell of a fresh book does!

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4. Shopping Is For All The Senses

I am surely the one to first feel the fabric, try it on next and feel good in it while looking into the mirror before finally deciding to make the purchase. Online shopping for clothes is a definite no-no for me. And, it sort of extends to other things as well. Other than the occasional ordering of a bouquet, I hardly find myself spending money online. I have to see it, touch it, feel it all. And who does not love carrying lovely shopping bags home!

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What are the things you are still old school about? Do any of these figure? Tell me about them!

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The #52BlogPostsProject

*INACTIVE*

When Divya’s text popped up on my phone screen, I almost had a flashback playing on a reel in my head. What she had suggested in her text was a superb idea and it made perfect sense for us to get together in this challenge. It was a thought I had once flirted with, for a brief moment but brushed it aside eventually. However, her sudden text coupled with her enthusiasm and support for me, I began to consider the possibility of embarking upon this journey she was asking of me, of both of us…

Divya’s idea was simple: Publish a post on our respective blogs once every week, for the next 52 weeks.

Isn’t that a wonderful thought to step into the New Year with? Of course, terribly daunting too!

We can find a million-and-a-one reasons for why we want to take up this challenge, but the primary reason is for us to reignite the passion for writing! And only writing can help you do that, really. Like how Liz Gilbert once said, “So if you want it to be better, then you’ve got to show up and do your part of the deal.” And that is exactly what the #52BlogPostsProject is going to be all about.

So hop along on this wonderful journey with us, as we try to show you a part of our world through these posts.

Also, allow me to introduce my amazing partner-in-writing: Divya Nawale. She has one too many feathers to her cap; multi-talented and a self-aware individual, she is an inspiration to me! Check out her blog here 🙂

How will the #52BlogPostsProject work? 

I plan to tag the title of my posts to indicate which week we are in, and hopefully that will separate my other posts with this, if I am miraculously able to write more than one post per week.

Please send in your suggestions, if any and all comments are welcome 🙂

Wish us luck, and hope you enjoy what we have to share!